In this post, we will be going over the different types of masochists you will find in BDSM along with their motivations.
Before we get into things, I want to point out that not all forms of masochism involve taking pleasure in pain. Instead, think of masochism as taking pleasure in being affected.
That said, let’s get started—
Adrenaline Junkie Masochist
Oh baby this is gonna huuurt! But I swear it’s worth the riiide, and if not, it’s worth the hiiigh!
This type of masochist is the same type of person who seeks extreme thrills, such as:
- Skydiving
- High-risk racing
- Rollercoasters
- Public sex
These masochists are looking for the endorphin rush you get from dancing with the devil or tempting fate. The emotional release can be similar to:
- Getting away with something
- Facing fear and flirting with danger
- “Feeling alive”
- Built up and released anticipation
- Taking on the unknown
The following are a few types of play associated with the adrenaline thrill-seeker masochist:
Devoted Servant Masochist
I would give up my life if it meant you would be happy.
The devoted servant masochist is someone who uses pain as a way to prove their allegiance.
This type of masochist is essentially willing to sacrifice themselves to prove how much they love and trust their partner.
This is essentially a form of martyrdom, which fulfills the following psychological needs:
- Sense of purpose and direction
- Focus outside of oneself
- Sense of importance and value
When I say a sense of purpose and importance, it’s because they are proving themselves to be of worth to their partner.
You don’t work on something you don’t have faith in.
In terms of romantic relationships, some people put their faith on the wrong person. Where they waste their time and energy on something they believe could work, when it reality—they are working on something that won’t work.
By being a devoted servant masochist, you are working on pleasing your Master because you have faith that they are someone worth trusting.
This is the mindset of someone who doesn’t want to live for themselves, but instead wants to build and grow with another.
Limit Break Masochist
Bring it on Jack! It ain’t over until the fat b*tch sings!
This is the masochist that carries an all-or-nothing approach and doesn’t know when to quit.
These limit break masochists can be known for the following in their regular lives:
- Ordering the hottest buffalo wings for the sake of the challenge, not the enjoyment of flavor
- Taking on pain, damage, and responsibility, until something starts to give
- The only time they know when to stop eating is when they run out of food
- Challenging others to hit them as hard as they can or to roast them
Behaviors similar to these can be reminiscent of feederism, degradation, impact play, and so on.
This masochistic type of personality likes to test their resilience moreso than experience painful sensations.
These are the people who feel like they have something to prove.
Atonement Masochist
Forgive me Father for I have sinned. No good deed goes unpunished.
These are people who want the full experience of being humbled for their actions.
You can also expect to see some funishment.
This fulfills the psychological needs that what you do matters and that you want to be held accountable for your actions.
The positive aspect of this is acknowledging that what you do in your life matters—this is a sign of a healthy human animal.
The unhealthy human animal is focused on proving to themselves and others that everything is meaningless, and may use BDSM to express that with the absolute ends of sadomasochism…
In toxic relationships, there are people who may cheat and then want their partners to cheat back on them so they can feel that the emotional landscape is even.
In terms of bad self-esteem, the atonement masochist may want to be punished because they believe their own existence is a violation in of itself—THIS IS BAD.
If this is the case, then post-scene this masochist should take note about how they feel. Because if they’re not feeling better about themselves (which is likely), and instead continue to feel “less than human”, then it’s important to get support from a mental health professional.
What you think and what you feel matters, because you matter.
Tension Release Masochist
This type of masochist essentially uses the endorphin rush from being prodded to release tension they’ve accumulated in their daily life.
This is the same way you might scream in a pillow, or tap into your aggression when playing sports, the tension release masochist uses their masochism to release tensions.
Here are some examples of how that can be expressed:
- Having someone talk down your capabilities to reduce the high expectations and earned reliance people have placed on you
- Getting flogged and letting your mind go someplace else, while the endorphins and impact help you shake off the tensions you’ve accumulated
Roleplay Masochist
This sort of masochism lends itself to the idea of being affected by others with social dynamics.
The roleplay masochist can enjoy being affected in the following roles:
- Damsel in Distress
- Pet Play
- Dollification
- Daddy Dom / little girl
- Slave
By playing out these roles, the masochist doesn’t have to do the thinking and instead gives themselves to the roles’ demands. Any pain that comes along with that reinforces the role that’s being played because pain makes things more real (you can’t explain away pain).
Painful Pleasure Masochist
The masochist who takes pleasure in experiencing pain is the most real with themselves (in my opinion).
The reason for this is because we all presume pain to be a “bad thing”. We judge this off of no real basis other than the undesired results that come from pain.
But if you are able to control the post-pain factors, you are free to judge whether you like the pain or not.
It’s sort of like having sex with and without a condom—before condoms there was a fear of unwanted pregnancies. Now with contraceptives, we can enjoy the act of unloading cummies into lady bits instead of having to worry about conceiving anything.
A simple example is that in a typical violent situation, if someone is wacking you with a cane it’s going to be with the intent of putting someone down. But in impact play, in respect to SSC, the scene is too controlled for anyone to be fatally wounded, generally.
When you take the actual danger, or loss, out of the situation—you can form judgments as to whether you actually low-key enjoy the sensation of physical or emotional pain.
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DOM SUB 101 teaches you essential basic and advanced BDSM concepts, such as DomSpeak, power exchange, finding a partner, poly jealousy, primal play, contracts, worksheets and so on.
Submissive Journal: 365 Daily Journal Prompts will help you develop your emotional awareness, build your kinky relationships, as well as explore your submissive self-image and sensual desires.
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Classic Black Flogger is an incredibly versatile 5-star, impact play toy for both beginners and seasoned players.
Discreet Remote Control Vibrator 3 is the funnest toy to have your partner wear for getting them hot and bothered anytime and anywhere. (Read review)
Rose 2-in-1 Vibrator is easily one of the most pleasurable experiences she’s looking to have.
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Bathmate Hydromax is the safest and most effective male enhancement product I’ve ever used to increase my length and girth. Read more here.
Relationship Subliminal for self-hypnotism will help you change your unconscious behavior, gain better relationships, and attract like-minded people and partners.
DOM SUB 101 (Lite) is an affordable alternative to the ever-growing DOM SUB 101. This is for curious kinksters who are on a budget.
Inner Shadow Work is my main website that goes over psychology, spirituality, emotional maturity, consciousness, etc. If you’re interested, click here.
