A Pleasure Dom, or Pleasure Dominant, is a person who enjoys pleasing their submissive counterpart sexually.
The phrase seemed to be coined around the time of the Covid-19 pandemic in 2020 by social media like TikTok.
4 Ways of Pleasure Domming
There appears to be four primary techniques involved in pleasure Domming:
- Sensation Play involves using sensation to bring pleasure or pain. Examples of this include:
- Wax Play
- Temperature Play
- Bondage
- and so on
- Edging involves teasing and denying sexual climax.
- Orgasm Control is where the Dominant has the final say whether the s-type is allowed to orgasm.
- Orgasm Torture typically involves a woman being forced to orgasm repeatedly, where it’s no longer pleasurable and instead downright uncomfortable physically and lead to emotional surrender.
The Pleasure Dom Mindset
The setup of a scene may have the Dom serenading the submissive in a very intimate way, where the room is dimly lit, scented, with petals on the bed, etc.
Then the Dominant would put their submissive in a position where they would use the techniques mentioned above.
The purpose however is to intensify or glorify the submissive’s orgasm or sexual experience.
What is the difference between Pleasure Dom vs Service Top?
A Service Top implies two things: (1) the person is acting in service to the be a Top, (2) and being a Top means that they are the more active person in the given form of play.
Basically, a Dominant can have their submissive act as a service top as a way to get submissive to do things to the Dominant with their permission. It sort of seems like a role reversal, but the Dominant is still in control while granting their submissive power over them for the form of play.
A Pleasure Dom seems to be more of someone who just operates in this fashion as part of their power exchange, or its a form of Domming a partner. You can probably see how a Pleasure Dom is a term that was formed by people who weren’t very educated in kink and BDSM to begin with.
The Problem with Pleasure Dom as a Concept
The concept of a Pleasure Dom is problematic because it seems to be used only in the context of two heterosexuals; a submissive woman and Dominant man. This means that the man’s orgasm becomes the point of focus, and the female orgasm much less so.
The Benefit to Pleasure Dom as a Concept
The phrase “pleasure Dom” is a great way to signal kink preference to others. Someone identifying themselves as a pleasure Dom makes it easy to figure out that this person has a preference for sexual forms of play.
Here are some resources I recommend:
DOM SUB 101 teaches you essential basic and advanced BDSM concepts, such as DomSpeak, power exchange, finding a partner, poly jealousy, primal play, contracts, worksheets and so on.
Submissive Journal: 365 Daily Journal Prompts will help you develop your emotional awareness, build your kinky relationships, as well as explore your submissive self-image and sensual desires.
Danger & Play BDSM Package includes handcuffs, mouth gag, kink paddle, collar and leash, nipple clamps, blindfold, shibari rope, and much more.
Classic Black Flogger is an incredibly versatile 5-star, impact play toy for both beginners and seasoned players.
Discreet Remote Control Vibrator 3 is the funnest toy to have your partner wear for getting them hot and bothered anytime and anywhere. (Read review)
Rose 2-in-1 Vibrator is easily one of the most pleasurable experiences she’s looking to have. (Read reviews)
Low Temp Wax Play Candles are incredible for very intimate, sensual experience that you and your partner will never forget. (Read guide)
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Bathmate Hydromax is the safest and most effective male enhancement product I’ve ever used to increase my length and girth. Read more here.
Relationship Subliminal for self-hypnotism will help you change your unconscious behavior, gain better relationships, and attract like-minded people and partners.
DOM SUB 101 (Lite) is an affordable alternative to the ever-growing DOM SUB 101. This is for curious kinksters who are on a budget.
Inner Shadow Work is my main website that goes over psychology, spirituality, emotional maturity, consciousness, etc. If you’re interested, click here.
