In this post, we go over how to practice ethical non-monogamy.
People interested in polyamory but don’t yet fully practice it are called “poly curious.” These people are usually monogamous who are thinking about switching to a form of ethical non-monogamy.
It’s not unusual to think that your partner might be open to dating other people. If you both want to try polyamory, you just need to figure out how.
Since your relationship is based on agreements of traditional monogamy, the decision to try something new is unlikely to come up spontaneously and in a straight line. Opening up a relationship takes care, communication, practice, and commitment.
What steps can be helpful to take in exploring ethical non-monogamy?
1) Deconstruct, before building
It can be perplexing that there aren’t many alternatives to monogamy in terms of relational models. Distancing yourself from previous behaviors and expectations may hurt you.
Investigating the meaning systems in your immediate environment and attempting to comprehend their level of influence on your life will be helpful in this regard. Most importantly, determine if they are right for you because the widespread socialization standard that condemns non-monogamous relationships (also known as mononormativity) may leave you feeling guilty, ashamed, or negative.
As you deconstruct what was modeled to you, you will become aware of how the models you know have affected your internal world.
Before you build, deconstruct. Such expectations may lead to unfavorable feelings and prevent an honest examination and comprehension of your needs. You can ask yourself questions to start the deconstruction process, such as “Where does the idea we have about how we should live our intimate relationships come from? “
2) Ask yourself what form of polyamory can satisfy your needs
You might need to try various options because different types of polyamory have different relationship types, frequency patterns, and other characteristics.
Spend some time investigating them, conversing with one another, interacting with the polyamorous community, and researching to delve into the vast world of moral non-monogamy.
3) Establish agreements and agree on the boundaries of relationships
Negotiating terms and creating agreements related to the exploration of polyamory are especially crucial if it represents a brand-new dimension. By doing this, even if your ideas and expectations differ, you can ensure that you respect each other’s needs.
All relationships require strong delineation, communication, and boundary-keeping abilities. There is no exception for polyamorous relationships.
Make an effort to draft sensible, understandable, reasonable, and adaptable agreements. Try to share your feelings and listen to each other’s worries.
Even though the choices made might not apply equally between partners, what matters is that you both authentically made the decision together.
Agreements may not be considered final; the decisions can be reviewed more than once. As the experimentation continues, new circumstances constantly arise that call for new agreements to be handled. Make sure you are at ease with the occasional decisions you make. Along the way, many agreements are made.
4) Reach effective consensus
Non-ethical monogamy’s nature is first and foremost derived from consent. Consensus is the outcome of a conflict and signifies general agreement on a course of action. Effective consent must be distinguished from “consent” that is being forced. Everyone involved, including those who are not part of your couple, needs to be happy with the decision that has been made. Make sure you have the opportunity to freely and without pressure express your consent.
Always consider that consent can be revoked and relationships can be questions. Even if negotiation is tedious, trial and error isn’t uncommon in these types of relationships.
5) Be patient and tolerant
Experimenting with ethical non-monogamy can take time. In some cases it can be lived with enthusiasm and curiosity, in others the numerous attempts can be trying.
Don’t rush the process, instead take it all one thing at a time and always learn from the past.
Here are some resources I recommend:
DOM SUB 101 teaches you essential basic and advanced BDSM concepts, such as DomSpeak, power exchange, finding a partner, poly jealousy, primal play, contracts, worksheets and so on.
Submissive Journal: 365 Daily Journal Prompts will help you develop your emotional awareness, build your kinky relationships, as well as explore your submissive self-image and sensual desires.
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Rose 2-in-1 Vibrator is easily one of the most pleasurable experiences she’s looking to have. (Read reviews)
Low Temp Wax Play Candles are incredible for very intimate, sensual experience that you and your partner will never forget. (Read guide)
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Bathmate Hydromax is the safest and most effective male enhancement product I’ve ever used to increase my length and girth. Read more here.
Relationship Subliminal for self-hypnotism will help you change your unconscious behavior, gain better relationships, and attract like-minded people and partners.
DOM SUB 101 (Lite) is an affordable alternative to the ever-growing DOM SUB 101. This is for curious kinksters who are on a budget.
Inner Shadow Work is my main website that goes over psychology, spirituality, emotional maturity, consciousness, etc. If you’re interested, click here.
