While “dirty” is often used in pornographic contexts, it’s also used in everyday conversation. Many people use dirty talk to get things going and improve their relationship with their partner.
Why would you talk dirty to your partner?
Talking dirty to your partner as part of the path to sex can increase sexual tension, which naturally leads to physical foreplay and increases passion during sex. Teasing can begin hours before you’re alone or together, building anticipation. When you’re not with the person you’re lusting after, dirty talk can help. When you’re feeling turned on, picking up the phone to talk dirty, or even better, using video calls, can be a fantastic experience. You can get into the game quickly if you know what to say to your partner to turn her on. With some sex toys and dim lighting, it will appear as if they are not far apart!
Dirty talk does not have to be dirty…
Repeating obscenities during sex does not appeal to everyone, but it does not have to be completely rude or dirty. Talking during sex can help make the moment explode while reassuring both of you that you’re doing a good job. Hearing your partner moan with delight and express how much they enjoy being with you confirms that you’re doing something right and may encourage you to be a little more daring.
What else can I say?
Instead of going straight into something shocking, try dirty talk gradually – it’s a good idea to test the waters first, otherwise you may end up confusing or turning off your partner. Going in with a predetermined phrase is the best way to start and allows both of you to get the vibe going before having sex. Once you’re in and feel like your partner is responding well to what you’re saying, you can branch out and try out different words and phrases to see how they react.
Here are some dirty talk phrases you can use with your partner before and during sex:
before sex
- I need you immediately.
- I get excited when I think of you.
- I cannot wait to be inside of you/have you inside of me.
- I intend to give you the best oral presentation you’ve ever had.
- I desire to kiss you everywhere…
- Tonight, you can do whatever you want with me.
- I cannot wait until we are alone and I can undress you.
- I am imagining us naked at this moment.
- I just remembered last night.
- Tonight, do you feel like advancing the night?
during sex
- You feel amazing.
- I adore how large/wet/soft you currently feel.
- Please do not cease your current activity.
- This is the best option.
- You make me very hot.
- I want you to assume command.
- I wish I could taste you.
- I want to make you come.
- I miss your body terribly.
- I want you to kiss or lick me here or there.
How do you talk dirty?
The first step is overcoming your nerves, especially if you haven’t used these words with your partner. Try to relax and have fun; if you’ve already had sex with your partner, a few dirty words won’t hurt. Sometimes how you say something during sex is just as important as what you say. If possible, use whispers and subtle tones; whatever happens, avoid making your words sound too brash, offensive, or dismissive – unless you both want to use them. It may sound silly, but practicing what you’re going to say ahead of time can be extremely beneficial. If you’re alone in the car or at home before your partner arrives, try out a few phrases and the tone of your voice to see if they feel natural. You probably feel silly, but at least you won’t be embarrassed in front of your partner later. Why not try dirty talk with your partner tonight and see if it works? Remember that the most important thing is that you are both comfortable and enjoying yourself.
Here are some resources I recommend:
DOM SUB 101 teaches you essential basic and advanced BDSM concepts, such as DomSpeak, power exchange, finding a partner, poly jealousy, primal play, contracts, worksheets and so on.
Submissive Journal: 365 Daily Journal Prompts will help you develop your emotional awareness, build your kinky relationships, as well as explore your submissive self-image and sensual desires.
Danger & Play BDSM Package includes handcuffs, mouth gag, kink paddle, collar and leash, nipple clamps, blindfold, shibari rope, and much more.
Classic Black Flogger is an incredibly versatile 5-star, impact play toy for both beginners and seasoned players.
Discreet Remote Control Vibrator 3 is the funnest toy to have your partner wear for getting them hot and bothered anytime and anywhere. (Read review)
Rose 2-in-1 Vibrator is easily one of the most pleasurable experiences she’s looking to have. (Read reviews)
Low Temp Wax Play Candles are incredible for very intimate, sensual experience that you and your partner will never forget. (Read guide)
The links above are NOT affiliate links. The product links are the exact same products I happily own from trusted vendor Sinful Goods.
Bathmate Hydromax is the safest and most effective male enhancement product I’ve ever used to increase my length and girth. Read more here.
Relationship Subliminal for self-hypnotism will help you change your unconscious behavior, gain better relationships, and attract like-minded people and partners.
DOM SUB 101 (Lite) is an affordable alternative to the ever-growing DOM SUB 101. This is for curious kinksters who are on a budget.
Inner Shadow Work is my main website that goes over psychology, spirituality, emotional maturity, consciousness, etc. If you’re interested, click here.
