What is an ethical non-monogamous relationship?
According to society, the most common love style among the masses is monogamy, or having only one intimate/romantic partner. Ethical Non-Monogamy, or ENM, has arrived.
ENM has been growing in popularity for decades and has recently entered the mainstream through articles, documentaries, and dating apps. Although the precise definition varies from person to person, ENM is an umbrella term for a type of love in which people engage with one or more romantic or sexual partners at the same time.
The term “ethical” is critical because it encompasses the required consent, understanding, and enthusiastic participation of all parties involved to avoid being considered cheating.
What are the various kinds of non-monogamous relationships?
If a relationship is consensually non-monogamous, it is most likely classified as ENM. It can be both sexual and romantic. Some regard it as a way of life, while others regard it as a liberating and enjoyable experience. The following are some examples of love styles that can be incorporated into ENM:
- Polyamory: People have multiple romantic relationships at the same time. Often people have a primary partner.
- Swinging: A couple meets other couples for sexual encounters where the partners are exchanged. Usually couples only have sex outside their primary couple on these arrangements/parties/dates.
- Monogamous: The term “monogamous” refers to couples who primarily experience a monogamous love style, but occasionally include others outside the couple for special occasions.
- Single Penis Policy: When one person in the relationship (often a queer/bisexual woman) in a relationship with a man (often who does not identify as queer) will pursue other women/women/queer/identified, but not other men.
- Polyfidelity: A group of people who are all equal partners in the relationship. Often sexual encounters and dating do not include people outside the group.
- Open Relationships: Considered another umbrella term, open relationships often include primary partners and people who seek sexual or romantic relationships with others.
- Hierarchical relationships: A relationship in which two people are primary partners while having “secondary” partners.
Why do people seek out these various types of love?
To get butter and butter money, of course! On a more serious note, people pursue ENM for various reasons.
Some people regard monogamy as a possessive or restrictive form of love.
Others are drawn to ENM because it allows them to be as authentic and complete as possible, meeting all of their needs, not just sexual ones. ENM enables some people to meet their emotional needs better because abundant love and support surrounds them.
Ethical non-monogamy can help participants gain confidence, meet new people, and grow in new social circles. Because ENM necessitates effective communication, trust, and boundaries, some couples or primary partners turn to it to strengthen their relationship and connection.
Make the ENM function
There is no one-size-fits-all solution for making ENM work for everyone, but consistent and clear communication can go a long way. NME may be something completely new for you, which is exciting, but it can also bring many new emotions and some vulnerability.
It is critical to identify your preferred mode of communication. You can find out by asking many questions and being honest with yourself. This will save you from future heartache or injury.
If you have a primary partner, you must communicate your desires to them. Some couples want their main partner to meet their other partners, while others don’t want to see pictures of them.
Open communication will keep partners from feeling hurt, paranoid, or jealous (which is normal!). It will also be necessary to discuss schedules such as going out and sleepovers with others: are there sleepovers once a week, once a month?
Limits are crucial. It is also not a one-time conversation. Because people and feelings change all the time, it will be permanent and changing!
It is critical to understand the distinction between rules and limitations.
Rules are frequently associated with control, which is neither cool nor healthy.
On the other hand, boundaries protect your mental and physical needs and limitations. You instinctively know what you require to feel loved, safe, and protected. Before introducing new dynamics or people to the scene, most people believe it is best to discuss limits and boundaries.
Here are some resources I recommend:
DOM SUB 101 teaches you essential basic and advanced BDSM concepts, such as DomSpeak, power exchange, finding a partner, poly jealousy, primal play, contracts, worksheets and so on.
Submissive Journal: 365 Daily Journal Prompts will help you develop your emotional awareness, build your kinky relationships, as well as explore your submissive self-image and sensual desires.
Danger & Play BDSM Package includes handcuffs, mouth gag, kink paddle, collar and leash, nipple clamps, blindfold, shibari rope, and much more.
Classic Black Flogger is an incredibly versatile 5-star, impact play toy for both beginners and seasoned players.
Discreet Remote Control Vibrator 3 is the funnest toy to have your partner wear for getting them hot and bothered anytime and anywhere. (Read review)
Rose 2-in-1 Vibrator is easily one of the most pleasurable experiences she’s looking to have. (Read reviews)
Low Temp Wax Play Candles are incredible for very intimate, sensual experience that you and your partner will never forget. (Read guide)
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Bathmate Hydromax is the safest and most effective male enhancement product I’ve ever used to increase my length and girth. Read more here.
Relationship Subliminal for self-hypnotism will help you change your unconscious behavior, gain better relationships, and attract like-minded people and partners.
DOM SUB 101 (Lite) is an affordable alternative to the ever-growing DOM SUB 101. This is for curious kinksters who are on a budget.
Inner Shadow Work is my main website that goes over psychology, spirituality, emotional maturity, consciousness, etc. If you’re interested, click here.